Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

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Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a shovel? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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What's the difference between working at Mc Donalds and working as a hooker? A hooker gets paid more.

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An atheist dies and so will we all, eventually.

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

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Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

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what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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A Pakistani news reader.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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