Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

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Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

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what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

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What's the difference between a duck?

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

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What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

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why was the man sad? his wife died

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

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A Pakistani news reader.

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Roses are red.. Your child is also red.. I drove my car over his face. <3

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Q: When do u know when your sister is on her period? A: Your dads dick tastes funny.

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I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a bridge? Everything, if you think that's funny, you're a terrible person.

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Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

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Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

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The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

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A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

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Q: What is the differenc between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babys? A: I dont have a lamborghini my garage.

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Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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