Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Smith.

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a shovel? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

A dinosaur walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender goes home and tells his wife what he saw. His wife leaves him.

A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

Why was Diana crying? Because she was penetrated.

So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

What's the difference between working at Mc Donalds and working as a hooker? A hooker gets paid more.

What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

An atheist dies and so will we all, eventually.

Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

What's the difference between a duck?

What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

A Pakistani news reader.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...