I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

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What's the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? I'll eat Megan Fox before I fuck her.

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Why did the blind man die? He had eye surgery and the doctor told him when he first opened his eyes there would be a very bright light, turns out he also had alzheimers and wandered onto the train tracks

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you haven't already said twice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 7 being the highest, what is you favorite color

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200,000 people are homeless! ...this year in america!

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. The man leaves in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Why was six afraid of seven? He was wanted for murder.

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Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

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What did the Mexican Have for Thanksgiving Dinner? A Turkey you racist!

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Why did the police officer arrest the black guy? Because the guy was black and the police officer was racist.

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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River Ravi flows in which state? Liquid state.

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What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

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I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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