How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happens when you bite the head off of two animal crackers and make them play leap frog? Nothing. Quit playing with your food.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

everybody loves raymond

thumb_up thumb_down -2

After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A: Knock Knock. B:Whose there? A:Jehovah witness!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A boy tells his teacher, "I want to be like hitler when I grow up and kill all the jews and one clown." The teacher replies, "Why the clown?" The boy says, "See no one cares about the jews."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

knock knock who's there? hope

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you catch wet wood on fire? Ask a business owner in Ferguson, MO, to keep it in their store.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops