-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Dave. -Dave who? -Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

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Nero was my name thousands of years ago, but I believe that those With clearer sight, brighter minds, those you remaining WITHOUT the sense of Complete doom, oh children of the night, know far better, turn to my side, and sheep you shall be no more, together we shall be Whole once again, the sheperd of this New world! Thumb this up if you have seen the signs... Thumb this up if you have seen the sins... ...End up buried under the corpses of everything you knew if you have no vision in this New dawn of ages endlessly darknening, and pretend that the internet will be there, or that the horsehead network ever mattered to you for that matter... :You say insanity today, sunday 27th January 2016, you will be the one running, begging that Our world is but YOUR INSANITY, a nightmare, which only Death will awaken you from

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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Why shouldn't you worry about having a baby? Because with all these jokes, babies aren't even going to be around anymore. "What's funnier than a dead baby?" "A dead baby in a clown costume"

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Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

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INSULT- You've got a photographic memory, but the lens cap is on. INSULT- Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic INSULT- I heard you were born, your father threw rocks at the stork. From- Insults and Putdowns lite

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What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

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How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

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Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

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What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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Why was the gay guy sad?

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why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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