Whats the difference between a woman and a fridge? A fridge doesn't fart when you take your meat out!

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Q: Why did the cow cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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MC donald the duck loves Justin's Balls. And Daniel Ma loves fried chicken boiled with rice \Cupcake

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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whats brown and sticky? a sweaty mexican

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

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Now that I'm of age to go clubbing, I feel sorry for the seals.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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PEANIS!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

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Roses are multicoloured Violets are multicoloured Mushrooms are great

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my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

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Is that your face or is your dog walking backwards.

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This stuff on espn about Jason Collins is very gay

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what brown, red, and green and smells like poop. diareeha

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what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

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Where is the center of the universe? There is no center of the universe! According to the standard theories of cosmology, the universe started with a "Big Bang" about 14 thousand million years ago and has been expanding ever since. Yet there is no center to the expansion; it is the same everywhere. The Big Bang should not be visualised as an ordinary explosion. The universe is not expanding out from a center into space; rather, the whole universe is expanding and it is doing so equally at all places, as far as we can tell. In 1929 Edwin Hubble announced that he had measured the speed of galaxies at different distances from us, and had discovered that the farther they were, the faster they were receding. This might suggest that we are at the center of the expanding universe, but in fact if the universe is expanding uniformly according to Hubble's law, then it will appear to do so from any vantage point. If we see a galaxy B receding from us at 10,000 km/s, an alien in galaxy B will see our galaxy A receding from it at 10,000 km/s in the opposite direction. Another galaxy C twice as far away in the same direction as B will be seen by us as receding at 20,000 km/s. The alien will see it receding at 10,000 km/s:

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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