Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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How do you get 100 people in one car. You can't.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

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what is red and lies in all four corners of the room? a baby that was playing with a chainsaw.

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Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

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youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

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Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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