There is something in my butt what is It. My thong

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What do you call a person with no legs playing soccer? A soccer player.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

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What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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What killed the name cool? Coolio

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Kris- "Hey! Ask me if I'm a tree! Kait&Alyssa- ".....Are you a tree?...." Kris- "No.(:"

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How do you get a clown to stop laughing? Throw an axe at it's face.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What do u firmly grasp and stroke until u can't go any longer? A shakeweight....

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

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you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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A dyslexic man's favourite clothing shop is Tampon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops