Why did the duck cross the road? Hurricane Katrina

Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let out the chicken?!?

roses are brown violets are brown, who took a shit in my garden

Why is six afraid of seven? Because 7 is black.

If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5 then all together you have $10. It was announced that the obverse portrait of Alexander Hamiliton would be replaced by the portrait of an undecided woman, starting in the year 2020. If you wait long enough, you can exchange the $10 for the new $10 bill.

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

why did he cat not land on its feet? it had 2 legs amputated due to cancer and animal abuse

your dads so fat, he makes your mom look skinny.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Noideer! No.Blind What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still Noideer! No, it's basically dead

Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

How did Justin Bieber die? He didn't. And we all need to stop making fun of that poor boy.

i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

What did the mentally challenged kid get on his test? Drool

Knock knok ! Whos there? Buhu ! Buhu Who? Why are you crying?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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