Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

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A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

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Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

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a lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for directions. the Bartender takes him into a room and rapes-him

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a man walked into a bar....

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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Why did the old man drop his milk? He had a stroke.

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What do you call two mexican's jumping the border? people with a hard life trying to get to the new world.

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why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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What's the deal with brown?

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

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roses are red violet is blue sugar is sweet f*ck you im a moon

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What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

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roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

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When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

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What do you call said black man flying an airplane? A pilot.

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Knock knock Get off my porch homo

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A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

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A man walks into a bar, and sees another man with a huge orange head. He asks the bartender, "Do you know why that man has such a huge orange head?" The bartender replies: I dont know, maybe if you buy him a drink he'll tell you. So that man walks over to the man with a huge orange head and buys him a drink. He says to him: Excuse me, sir but why do you have a big orange head? The man with the big orange head replies: Well, one day I was walking along the beach and I found an interesting bottle. So I opened it and out popped a genie. He told me I had three wishes. The first thing I asked for was to have all the money that I wanted, and the means to get more. Suddenly, My pockets were overflowing with cash. So then I wished for the most beautiful, perfect woman ever created and there she appeared in front of me, and we immediately fell in love. The third thing I asked for was a huge orange head.

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What is blue and feels like a shirt? A blue shirt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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