what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

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Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides not to racially profile them and continues on his own business.

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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What's the difference between a McDonald's and Michael Jackson? One is a fast FOOD restaurant, while the other likes having sex with little boys.

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

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What happens when you leave Toby alone in your house? He eats your carpet, some pillows, ur dog, ned, neds dog and a glass panel. This is why 2 +h = plugger +Mount Everest (I is potato annoying). Bonjour.

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What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

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Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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