Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

I died shortly after writing this.

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

Why did the man have a curiously-shaped scar on his cheek? He had been mauled by an owl as a child.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

Why did the man reach for his gun? Because he wanted to kill someone.

This is a haiku A lovely type of poem It's snowing on Mt. Fuji

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

This is an anti joke

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

Why did Jake fall off his bike? His mom threw a fridge at him.

Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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