What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

Why did the prostitute survive the gunshot? She was wearing a bulletproff vest.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

How many Babies can be drowned in a toliet at once? idk the bathtub is much more convienient

What's white and yellow with red all over? Vietnam War

What's Chris Benoit up to? Just hangin'

Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck

What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

why did the boy die? because he got shot

Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

Q: why does the fire breather hate his job A: his parents were burned to death MR

what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

Guess Penn State Is Holding Jerry Sandusky Day this Saturday against Nebraska. All Kids 10 and Under get in Free...

why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...