Why did Jimmy cry? His mom raped him.

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how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

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how do you know when you're a man? massive erection.

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Q. what does a metal slinkey and a retarded person have in common? A. you will smile watching one fall down the steps

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What did the fish say when it hit the big stone wall? DAM

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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what does a chair look like? a chair.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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What happens if you fell off a 600 foot cliff? You die.

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A baby walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "what'll ya have, Sport?" The baby's family runs in with a video camera screaming for joy over his first steps.

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My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

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Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog Woof.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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