What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Yo momma's so bulimic, and there's nothing funny about it at all.

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

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What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

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Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jerry Jerry Who? Jerry Sandusky, I've come to rape your kids.

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

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Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

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i died. new product by steve jobs

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops