What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

Your all fags

What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

whats red with blue spots and is highly inteligent? an apple. i lied to you and am sorry

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

A man burps while sitting at dinner. Everyone suddenly stops eating and stares at him. How does he get out of it? Answer: He says, "Excuse me."

A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

what's orange, round, that like to play and kill poeple and not in a video game? a) a freaking orange b) a super ball c) a dog painted in orange d) samus aran e) none of the previous answer

How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

This is not an anti joke.

whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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