In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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A walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Not getting a response, the disoriented bartender realizes he was talking to his own reflection in the mirror at the back of the bar.

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Did the Jewish surgeon charge extra for circumcisions? Nope, he just kept the tips

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

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How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

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I would rape her

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How old are you? 20

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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what starts with an f and ends with a uck? firetruck!!

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Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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