So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I scream. You scream. We all scream. Because there is a rapist in the room.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

who's a slut... you're mom

thumb_up thumb_down +22

laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +22

WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A guy walks into a bar with a watermelon under his shirt. The bartender asks what is under his shirt. He says, a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? There's an alive one at the bottom what's worse than that? He ate his way out what's worse than that? He enjoyed it

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a three toed 9 foot man. His name.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

It wa Jerry's first day of kindergarten He pulled out a .44 magnum and shot himself under the chin where he was instantly dead... Yes, dead

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops