Kid 1: Hey, guess what? Kid 2: Your MOM! HAHA! Kid 1:... My mother died two months ago from brain cancer after being shot in the head while fighting for our country in Iraq... Kid 2:.... um.. Your mom...?

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

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(A man in a dark van pulls up)... Hey kids can you come help me find my puppy? The kids get in the car and they find the puppy in a near by park. The kids are then safely returned home.

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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All your base are belong to us. Shame on you for making fun of the Japanese. They can't help their broken English sometimes. How would you like it if someone were to nitpick about every single word you typed? Yeah, bet you wouldn't like that, would you? Would it make you feel a bit more guilty to know these people suffered through a horrible earthquake and tsunami - and still managed to survive? Huh? Or that they continue to outshine most other countries in the world in the field of high-technology? Sure, maybe they DID blow up Pearl Harbor in 1941 and send us reeling into another World War. Everyone makes mistakes. Based on the past, "All your base are belong to us" seems pretty trivial now, doesn't it? Go apologize to a Japanese man right now, and never speak of this again.

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Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

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What's funnier than 24? My life.

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

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Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

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I hope the Angels win the pennant No pun intended

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the fat lady said that it runs in the family im pretty sure nothing RUNS in her family

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What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

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Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

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"I just don't understand the difference between yours and mines." "Well, you see, yours belong to you, whereas mines explode when you step on them."

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who is jacked and looks like a beast? • James Cornish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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