Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

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There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

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Man 1: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Man 2: There is no verb in that sentence

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

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get off me you fat b*tch or i will mash you up like a potato

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The WNBA is on the cooking channel

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Roses are red, Violets are BLACK!

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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Why was the man waiting at the bus stop? He was on his way to work

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A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

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tight butthole 4 lyfe.

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Robin Robin Who? Robin Williams Whoa, too early bro

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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