How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

Q.What did the German say when he walked into the bar? A.Ich möchte ein Bier bitte. Das würde mich viel besser fühlen. Meine Frau ist gerade gestorben, weil ich sie zu Tode prügeln, und ich bin ein Alkoholiker.

What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

Q: How many black guys does it take to black top a driveway? A: I can't give you a definitive answer unless I know the area to be covered, the thickness of material to be applied, and the capabilities of each individual working that particular day.

whats the difference between and clorox wipe and a paper towel? a clorox wipe is wet.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

TELL

I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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