'Dyslexic man walks into a bar... and orders a pint

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

A black man walks into a bar. His parents were immigrants from South Africa.

Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

What did the doctor say to the young boy? We only planned on a annual checkup but have discovered that your and aids baby and only have 3 days to live. Tell your family members goodbye you'll be on life support in the next couple hours.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

Why was the Asian guy dumped by his hot girlfriend? Well you know what they say about Asian guys.... They are too dedicated to their schoolwork.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

What is the difference between a black man and a speed bump? A black man is a living thing and a speed bump is not.

One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

How come Kristin cant go play soccer anymore? She broke her leg kicking her brother in the face.

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

i dont know why but when ever i see jew they always say "whats up?"

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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