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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

What did the clinically depressed man get for Christmas? He received many of splendid gifts and a joyous day with his family. He realized that his life isn't so bad after all, and went home with his head held high. He was then eaten by a vicious looking 7.

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son Scotty was grabbed by the sexual predator 4 blocks from the school, and your daughter Sally tried to run and is now under the wheels on the bus going round and round.

What is worse than blue balls for a guy? Depending on the girl, absolutely nothing. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

What has a head but can't see? A penis.

Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

I Won a Math Debate................ say it fast unless your blind then dont say it wait you cant read it so uhhm Alaska

Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Food and blankets from a nearby shelter.

Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

What did death say to life? Go die

you suck

Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

Why is French Fries not a Chinese Food? Answer: Because the Chinese people will get offended.

how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

And Stephen Hawking said.

Joe diragi is gayer than elton john

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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