Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

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Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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A walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Not getting a response, the disoriented bartender realizes he was talking to his own reflection in the mirror at the back of the bar.

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How can you spot a blind person at a nudist colony? They might be carrying a white stick, or have a guide dog or someone to help them navigate the premises.

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what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

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Q. What time is your appointment with the Chinese dentist? A. 20 past 4

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why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

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Why do fancy unicorns wear jackets? Because they're fancy.

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I would rape her

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How old are you? 20

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A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

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what starts with an f and ends with a uck? firetruck!!

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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Church.

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whats black, dirty, and full of trash? A trash can

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Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops