Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

What did the mime say to the girl? .......

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

Cows are land manatees.

whats worse than dying alone? dying with a boner.

What's worse than stepping on chewing gum A clown throwing bricks at orphans

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

So I was walking down the road today

Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? Well, he's dead.

Know what people hated the most? 9-11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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