What did Johnny do this wednesday? He went to school to be academically taught to get a high GPA of all the other children so he could go and pursuit his dream so he won't be left at home with a drunk wife and 6 kids with $190,000 in debt from the IRS

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Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

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Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioFUrwny1c

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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Q: What's funnier than a baby in a blender? A: A baby in a clownsuit in a blender.

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knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

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what is a chicken answer: chicken

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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A man walks into his house only to find someone in the livingroom touching the stereo. He then goes up to his wife, and kisses her.

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Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

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A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

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On the dora show when they asked where the Monster was why did the arrow point left instead of right?? Because it was scared

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick... Jack didn't make it over the candle stick and died.

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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Q. Why did the fat boy cross the road? A. To go on a diet

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? That boy that dropped a perfectly good ice cream cone from a road accident involving a bus due to lack of road safety awareness Oh yeah, and I guess the fact that he probably died or was injured for life is pretty bad too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops