Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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Why is six scared of seven? Because seven is in his house with an axe.

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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Why didn't the cow go to the candy store It had diabetes poor cow :(

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Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms, legs, and an eyepatch A: Names

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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If u swipe fast u will see fish swimming -////--/// //-///--// --//--/// ---/////- -/////--/ ////---// ---///--- ---////-- --////--- //--///-// -//----/// -/-///-/// -/-/-/-/-/ -////-///// -/-/-/-/// -///------ ---------- --///-///-/ -////-//--- -/-/--/--- -/-/-////// ---------- --------- I will call ur doctor to tell him u are retarded

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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A: My dog has no nose. B: How does it smell? A: Terrible.

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What do you call a man with no arms? A: A Man with no arms.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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Whats brown a sticky, shit

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koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

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A father was angry at his daughter's boyfriend because he took her virginity. The boyfriend said he was ashamed that he never told her he has AIDS.

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Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

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whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops