a duck walks in to a gay bar and asks for a stick they asked where he wanted it before he could answer he was rapped

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

oooh look a banshee

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What does water smell like? water.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two men are in a bar. One of them turns to the other one and says, "I've slept with your mom." The other one replies "Go home dad you're drunk."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man with Alztheimers walks into a bar. He forgets the purpose of being there.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

DARK FACT: A ratchet black chick would say that was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Just Replying to Brock Facebook request Brock you should know by now that i am at your school talk to me there. Plus i loved the kiss you gave me in science. Now that tested my chemistry. Hehe. Emma Brown xOxOxOxXXXXXoOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's brown and sticky? A Stick

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man's car broke down on a lonely country road in the middle of a stormy night. Spotting a light in a farmhouse nearby, he made his way there through the mud and driving rain, and knocked on the door. The farmer who lived there answered, and said what while he didn't have any room in the house, the barn would provide shelter and warmth until morning. Thankful for the hospitality, the stranded man made his way to the barn and made a place to sleep in the hay. As the lightning flickered outside, briefly illuminating the barn's interior, he noticed knot-holes in the wood of the stall walls, and the hoses of a milking machine laying nearby. He then fell fast asleep. The farmer woke him up in the morning, and together they rode on a tractor to the road to make the necessary repairs to the man's automobile, but only after enjoying a country breakfast prepared by the farmer's wife and lovely eighteen year old daughter.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did Helen Keller say when she got raped? Stop raping me.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the baby cry? Because he fell off a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Who are doctors and literally are porn stars

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops