Xzibit

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

Why did Sandy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sandy.

Knock knock Who's there Police

Why did the boy tell the fly to eat the cheese? A: because he wanted him to

Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

say cheese

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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