~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realizing the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

A black man walks Into a bar.

Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

Obamacare

What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Why did the girl fall from the swing? She was laughing at an anti-joke.

what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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