why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the plumber start to cry? his family died

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What time is it? I believe it's half past 10, sir. Damn, I'm late for a meeting. May I ask, what time are you supposed to be there? 11 O'clock Why sir you have half an hour left. No shiitt, sherlock

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Indian homosexual shoot his dog? Because it was old

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Jimmy say when the bully poured milk on his head? Nothing, instead he took out a shank and proceeded to stab him 30 times and let him bleed to death for being a douche.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two families of pedophiles go to the beach. One of the dads lays down to suntan and looks at the other dad. "Hey! Get out of my son!" he exclaims.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Jew and a German walk into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black man go to prison? He was visiting his client to give him legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops