What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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a horse nibbled a baby

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A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

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Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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penus

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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What did the mime say to the girl? .......

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There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

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What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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That's what she didn't say

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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