Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a nun who is just walking around? A Roman Catholic

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because last year, when 6 was going to the gas station, 7 approached him and said "gimme all your money or else I'll shoot you". 6 was so scared he ran away crying. About a few days later 6 spots 7 again and this time he was with 9. He said "yo 6! If you don't give me your money, im gonna do this to you!" and then 7 started biting and chewing 9 as if he was some kind of cannibal. 6 ran away and called the police. He told him that 7 ate 9.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -6

once upon a time, it snowed

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why is Steve Jobs dead, but Bill Gates isn't? Because Bill Gates wasn't diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did the man buy kool aid? because it was on sale and he was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did sally fall of the swing? She had no arms or legs Knock knock who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops