A man knocks on a wooden door. A woman says who is it?

Whats brown and sticky? ..Poo

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Who?

In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue. Wouldn't want to be caught in the crossfire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. The chicken was run over by a truck before he could get to the other side

women's rights

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

If only i were a man! You not! Your a.... WO-MAN!

Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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