Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

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If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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sorry, that was a really bad joke, joking just joking, of course we can chat later, you got something in particular to do?

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas?? Nobody knows because he had no arms, therefore he could not open any presents.

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What happens when a black man falls out of a tree? He gets hurt.

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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What did the clinically depressed man get for Christmas? He received many of splendid gifts and a joyous day with his family. He realized that his life isn't so bad after all, and went home with his head held high. He was then eaten by a vicious looking 7.

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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How are a dead chicken and a woman alike? They both belong in the kitchen

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Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What has legs but can't walk? A table...or a dog with four broken legs.

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What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a psychopath, that's why.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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How many Asians did it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1 Asians are just like every one else

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops