What did the mute say to the deaf man?

Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

womens rights

what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

GOODJESUSLORDALMIGHTY dis boy myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy i can't even................ fhrejhklgfjgtedlfcgrbh http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=231&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=6-GniQ6ct-j0HM:&imgrefurl=http://katiespilling.blogspot.com/&docid=6oY2cEt2vFEq0M&imgurl=http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7nKXEePj87o/T5dBnSfhaBI/AAAAAAAAAHw/RNSE68GzbjU/s1600/Harry%252BStyles%252Bboy%252Bband%252BOne%252BDirection%252Barrives%252B1Tg3l2FYklYl.jpg&w=396&h=594&ei=2Y7HT6jnL4e69QSK2oW5Dw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=244&vpy=12&dur=543&hovh=160&hovw=106&tx=72&ty=122&sig=110416686013590693091&page=18&tbnh=160&tbnw=106&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:231,i:105

knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

When an intellectual was told by someone, "Your beard is now coming in," he went to the rear entrance and waited for it. Another intellectual asked what he was doing. Once he heard the whole story, he said: "I'm not surprised that people say we lack common sense. How do you know that it's not coming in by the other gate?"

I hope you shut the others down before you called me by my name, otherwise this will convo will get fairly short.

you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

nick ya honkin of b.o m8

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

split your ass cheek

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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