How many Aumish farmhands does it take to operate a state of the art commercial laser-cutter? One,provided he has the relevant training and experience.

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Why couldn't the old man read the street sign? Because there were no words. Just an arrow designating a trun up ahead.

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what did the green grape say to the purple grape? i'm green.

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What are the two biggest jokes in College Football? Auburn and Florida! Roll Tide!

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

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Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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What is orange, has 7 legs, and makes the same noise as a crow? If you can think of something that fits all of those characteristics, you need help

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How does shit taste?\ Good.

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1,2,3,4,5... 6.

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when there's trouble lurking in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? The local authorities.

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Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because his work office was there and if he had not crossed, he would have had to get back in his car and parked in the company parking space therefore taking more time and costing a small but significant amount of money

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whats worse than 2 people dying? 3 people dying.

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Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

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Andrew's a bald wankstain.

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Curiosity killed the cat and was sentenced to prison for animal abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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