Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

What do you all a dead black man? A corpse.

A girl gets raped -teagan d

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

why did the black man die? the man bled out, and doctors did everything they could.

"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...