why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

thumb_up thumb_down +10

heads up!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Any similarity between Jesse and a human is purely coincidental!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why couldnt james zatts swim? he was half black

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mom is so fat and stupid that she used butter to get through the doorway, but she ate it

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there? Not you

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks GET OVER IT

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops