When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

What is the meaning of life? 42

What does a man say to his annoying friend? Please stop annoying me now.

What happened to the bus? An unexpected, unforseen, instantaneous, sudden finger began to slowly disintergrate the earth

Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

You're Mother's so fat, she sat on a chair, and it broke.

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night and realized that his house was being robbed.

"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

What's wrong with Barney? He's big and purple.

How do you call a cat for it's dinner? Come here cat!

Q-what did the black man say before he crossed the road? A-i wanna cross the road.

Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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TWATFROST HOLOCOSTME sOME MONEY TO GET A BOOB JOB HAHAHAHA BALOWJOB

What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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