Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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What's black, white and red all over? A cow after slaughter.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A dozen burly firefighters ready to stick it in your pooper

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Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

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Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

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There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

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Nice belt.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

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Fine Nero, but I will be keeping an eye on you.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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why did corey cross the road? the green man flashed.

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What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Your momma's so fat she has diabetes.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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How did the blonde die? Frogs teleported from the future and brutally murdered her with forks.

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So there were two... sigh... I hate my life....

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Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

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What did the clitoris say to the labia? I'm from the hood, the clitoral hood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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