- Anti Joke

Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

what starts with F and ends with ead? Fred was walking to school one day when he heard a strange noise in a tree. He walked up to the tree, looked up, and saw a cat. Fred was late for class, so he decided to go to school and help the cat out after school. Eight hours later, Fred came up to the tree and looked up to see if the cat was there. It wasn't. The cat was lying next to the tree, dead.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

Why did the man fall down? Because he was pushed of a 5 story building

why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

There once was a man who couldn't finish any sente

What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

A girl gets raped -teagan d

bryden is a faggot

Why did the fat boy cry? His grandmother died

Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number