I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock no ones home

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

your skull would make a nice pen holder

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jamie stegman has no life he is a nerd while his sister is giving him a z-j while jacob comes in and starts rubbing the lamp and then the crazy man ate the orange then farted in all of there face. NeonFAILsky xoxo

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If you are floating down main street in a canoe and your front right propeller falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey wanna hear joke? ........ yeah .......me too

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops