Me: You want pie? You: Yeah what flavour? Me: Pie flavour.

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

what's the difference between "rita , sue and bob too ," and rocky II ? rocky II is about boxing

Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

How do you get a clown off of a swing? Hit him with an ax.

A Haitian walks into a bar. It collapses.

Yo mom is so fat and stupid that she used butter to get through the doorway, but she ate it

What did the Jew do before the movie? He turned off his cell phone.

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks GET OVER IT

What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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