What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

your mom died.

Q: What do Magic Johnson and Freddie Mercury have in common? A: Freddie Mercury is dead.

these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

What do you call a person who dies in march A dead person

Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

ok

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

Don't worry, I'm not as random as you think I salad

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "What is this? A joke?" They then proceed to rape the barman.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

Legal Mexicans in Texas

Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

Why did the baby die? Cuz the father had a small dick.

Mommy mommy I don't want to see grandma. Shut up and keep digging.

What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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