Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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A: If you were stranded on an island and you could only have one thin, what would it be? B: A boat A: That makes sense

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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why didnt Timmy get anything for Christmas?His mom told santa he was very naughty that year

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Faces like yours belong in the Zoo. Don't be mad I will be there too. Not in the gate but laughing at you.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

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One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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