how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

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What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

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Who won the race across the highway, the Mexican or the Frenchman? Neither, as they were struck by a mac truck when attempting to run across the highway and were both killed instantly on impact.

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Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and mild nudity.

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What caused the Berlin Wall to come down? Gravity

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

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What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

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You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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In Soviet Russia my freedoms are severally restricted by communism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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