What did the skeleton say to the vampire? Nothing because a skeleton wouldn't have a larynx.

What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

Why didn't the woman make sandwiches? She was making baguettes.

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family cried about his final days of his life.

A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

What did the cancer patient get for his birthday HIV

What's red and sticky A DEAD BABY

outside your comfort zone

How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

You know what they say about a guy with big feet? He wears large socks and has big shoes.

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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