What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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Here's a joke for u Hahaha suck on it I wasnt going to make u laugh o yea ur mom died

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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