What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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There are two types of people in the world: humans

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

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what smells like tuna? my underwear

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One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

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What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

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How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

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Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

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Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's been brutally cut open.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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